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Well, I will dedicate this first blog in introducing myself and give you just some background information about me, and how I come about playing the saxophone. It was a rather sad, crazy yet inspiring story I must say. I feel rather emotional writing this blog entry about my past.

As a child, I was a very shy and sensitive child. Not to forget that I was quite chubby as well. There was a period of time in the 90s where gigs are shown regularly on television on people playing musical instruments. They play lots of Jazz festivals as well. There was this … mysterious feeling when I first laid eyes on this musician, holding that odd shaped instrument. I always fantasized about myself playing that … particular shiny instrument. What is that …? Why does it sound so beautiful …? There is so many people cheering for him …

And here we are, from then, I was keen to find out about that instrument. I entered secondary school at age 12, and I have decided to join the concert band. When I first went in, I instantly asked the tutor about that particular ‘instrument’. We’re supposed to try other form of instruments to see if it piques our curiosity, or suitability. Drums, clarinets, trumpets, trombones, flute, piccolos … all that jazz. I was looking around frantically hoping that I will find that … what is it called?

Something caught my eye … It was that ‘instrument’. A senior band member was holding it. Weird, it looks bigger. Has a curved neck.

I ran towards the woodwind section and told the tutor I want to play this.

“Wing Chung, this is a saxophone.”

Those magical words … So this is what they call this beautiful instrument. A saxophone. Even when he insist I try other instruments beforehand, I was adamant to play this, by any means necessary. On a personal level, reflecting the past from my perspective now, I guess it is my own way of see how I can ‘fit’ into everyone and express myself. Then, it was decided. I was assigned to the woodwind section, to play the saxophone.

For many days, I had restless nights, dreaming and thinking how it will be my turn someday to be on that grand stage, playing the saxophone and people cheering for me. And I have to wait two weeks before I were to be assigned a saxophone by the concert band. Friday … it was time for my extra curricular activity, and I know this is the time. My time.

I was assigned this … shiny horn. I remember particularly what model it is. I will never forget the look of the saxophone. It did come in a roughed up case though, with numbers scribbled all over. As I opened the case, it was a Yamaha YAS-23. From this moment, as much as I thought everything would be smooth sailing, things went nowhere but downhill …

The first thing I learnt is the embrouche. I had a really tough time even trying to get a sound out of the mouthpiece. It squeeks. My lips hurt. My mouth are sore. I have no idea what strength reed I was using then. Maybe a 3? I can’t figure out why they would start me out with a 3 to think about it. I kept trying, trying and trying. Days turn into weeks. Nothing. I became … frustrated.

The tutor did suggest that I try a tenor saxophone instead, do to my size. I did try it, yet the embrouche is the ultimatum that does me in. I have no problems reaching for keys. Still, I went back to playing the alto. I just want to start making music. I want to get going and play. I hated music theory. They didn’t say anything about reading something when playing the saxophone. At least that guy on the stage didn’t …

And being in the concert band, I have to do constant marching and regimental routines. I absolutely do NOT get it. I have no rhythm, coordination and most importantly; patience. Not forgetting the senior band member was always ever harsh with me, telling me off and such which demoralizes me day by day… I feel so useless. Not forgetting, in the 90s, a Yamaha saxophone is considered VERY expensive. You guys should know that, and my mom (single parented) cannot afford one due to having to take care of the whole family alone.

I lack perseverance, determination and faith.

One fine day, when I cannot tolerate this anymore, I walked out during practice session. I never looked back. I was almost in tears. I told myself that I will never learn how to play the saxophone. I know I was not good enough. I promise myself that I will never touch another saxophone ever again.

…

7 years past. It seems only like yesterday that I finished my National Service with the Republic of Singapore Air Force. During these years, I have grown and matured at such intense rate. I became a fine young man, one of the best soldiers of my kind in my regiment. I became very charming, sociable and outgoing. Still, this particular matter has always haunted me, like a spectre (as quoted from Marx Manifesto!). I look deep within and wondered … “What will become of me if I have stayed and continue?”

This, probably has became my greatest life regret ever. I never thought I have been defeated so easily like this. This makes running a marathon seems nothing. And then, I have decided to set my mind up, and brace myself in facing my fears; learning the saxophone again. And there you go, that was two years ago. I play the saxophone now. On my Mark VI. Still far from that childhood dream of playing on stage, but I can promise you that it will happen.

Recently, the first saxophone I ever owned turned 30. I was 15 in March of 1979 when it arrived brand new from Manny’s, the NYC music store. I still play it, although in the last 30 years it has gone through long periods of silence. It is an alto, Selmer USA, model Signet, and it cost me $325.00. A schoolmate played that sax in the inauguration and closing ceremonies of the 8^th Pan American Games, held in Puerto Rico in July of 1979, while I played his tenor, a Selmer USA Bundy.

With my Signet alto I played at the School Concert Band from August, 1979 until my high school graduation in May, 1981. Then I played it at the Big and Concert bands of the University of Puerto Rico, Cayey Campus. In those college years (’81 to ‘86) I played with salsa and rock bands and had a blast.

In June of 1991 I was already a lawyer when I purchased, also from Manny’s, another alto, a Yamaha 62 (for which I paid $1,875.00 back then). Years later, when I overhauled and played again the Signet alto, I noticed that it sounded better than the Yamaha. Last September I sold the Yamaha and got a Mauriat soprano, which I found much better sound wise than the Yamaha 675 I had and also recently sold. Now I’m planning on getting a Yanagisawa A-991, either the lacquered one or the silver plated. Any suggestions and insights are welcome!

- Roberto A. Fernández

I don’t usually blog, but since I was checking something, I thought why not share this amazing performance.